Yamcha's Muffin
by YamchavsTenshinhan
Summary: Yamcha has a muffin. Although...we don't focus on Yamcha and his muffin that much. Instead, we focus on Tien and his stupidity. THERE WILL BE A SEQUEL! warning: character death. K  to be safe.


**Hello all you people! I am back! I was too lazy to get on and I couldn't think of any ideas... anyways this is MY FIRST DBZ fanfic! PLEASE ENJOY!**

**WARNING: THIS MAY BE SO BAD IT'S GOOD. Also, please don't put any negative reviews or any flames or criticism...or...I will have to use...THIS! *Gets into Kamehameha stance***

**Ka...me...ha...me...HA! That's what I'll do, bitch! *0.o* I'm gonna begin now...awesome-awesome-awesome-awesome-awesome-awesome-awesome-awesome-awesome-awesome-awesome-awesome-awesome-awesome-awesome-awesome-awesome-awesome-awesome**

Yamcha stared at the plate, wide-eyed. It was the most amazing, yummiful (yum-e-full) thing he had EVER seen. It...was...a...muffin. BUT NOT JUST ANY MUFFIN! One of the most greatest things you'll EVER taste in your lifetime.

"...So that's whatcha think, huh?" Tien said to Yamcha, who was having a staring contest with the muffin.

" Well, of course, Tenshinhan. You see, your muffins ARE THE BESTEST! Now if you excuse me, I have to get back to my previous activity that SOMEONE interrupted." He pointed his finger up as he said that, then continued the stalking of- I MEAN the staring contest with the muffin. -_-'

" So you're saying that stalking-"

"STARING!" Tien rolled his eyes.

_Ah great,_ Tien thought

"You know what, forget it, I'm not talking to you anymore," and...being the idiot Tenshinhan is, he placed his hand on the oven door (like the top part near where the handle is), his hand slipped, went into the oven (which he forgot to turn off) and when he fell, he fell fowards so the oven door shut on his arm (he fell fowards AND inwards into the oven...how sad...well his arm did...anyways...how the heck would HE fit into an oven?)

"GOD DAMN-IT! YAMCHA! HELP ME! HELP ME!"

"Not right now,"

"FOR CRYIN OUT LOUD! STOP STARING AT THAT FUCKIN THING AND HELP ME FOR GOD'S SAKE!" (The reason why he couldn't pull himself up is because he slipped, you see, and since he's panicing and his body weight is on the oven door and his arm, it makes it impossible for him to get up.) (OK, not ENTIRELY impossible.)

While Tien was yelling and being ignored, Goku, Krillin and Gohan walked into Tien's house. Random, huh? And surprisingly, Krillin is mentioned more than the other two guys. (Ok so 1st of all, I don't know why Tien's cooking muffins and why he's being ignored and 2nd of all, Yamcha doesn't live there. He just happened to come stop by and say hi, then saw the muffin.) For some VERY odd reason, everyone noticed Yamcha, but not Tien. I guess they didn't notice the fact that their friends arm is burning up.

"*sniff sniff* What smells like chicken?" Goku said, sniffing the air.

"DAMN IT!"

"Tien!" Krillin said. He was trying to get Goku and Gohan's attention but they were stalking the- I MEAN, well ya,stalking the muffin, along with Yamcha. Krillin ignored that and ran to Tien. They kept trying to pull his arm out but...for some strange reason...the oven door won't open.

"HOW THE FUCK DID IT GET STUCK!" Krillin yelled, trying to pull Tien's arm out of the oven door.

'"HOW THE FUCK SHOULD I KNOW! JUST KEEP PULLING!"

"Muffin..." Yamcha, Goku and Gohan said, wide-eyed. (...And back to Krillin and Tien)

Now, both of Krillin's feet were on the door of the oven, as Krillin, was trying to put Tien's arm out of the oven. It moved a little, but they both felt it. It made a large SQUEEEAK sound. Krillin went flying back into a wall and Tien almost screamed bloody murder. But he screamed pretty loud. So loud that... "Shh!' The muffin-stalkers said, putting one finger up to their mouths, then you know the drill. (They are being mentioned WAY too many times.)

Krillin then got out of the Krillin-shaped hole in the wall and was pissed. Not at Tien, but his arm. He kicked it. Tien twitched violently and screamed a little, due to pain. He kicked it again, only harder. Tien jumped up and yelped, then screamed due to the jumping. Then Krillin jumped back, got into the Kamehameha position and started to say it.

"Ka..."

"NO!" Tien's eyes got WIDE, wider that those guys over there.

"Me..."

"NONONONONONONO!" He paniced. His arm was practically gonna get obliterated. His other arm got cut off. But he got it back. how was he supposed to get this one back?

"Ha..." Tien then started to yell and cuss, alot. He said it all VERY panicky, not angrily. He was too panicked to be angry or pissed off at Krillin.

"Me..." Then, he tried to take cover, but of course, it failed and made him scream (pain). Tien gulped. He was most likely sure he was gonna lose his life, his arm for sure.

"HA!" the blue explosion of power was aimed straight towards Tien. It blew up half of his house.

The brown coffin lay on the marble table. flowers of all assortments of colors lay on it. Everyone was crying.

"This...SUCKS!" Krillin yelled, standing right by the guy who's like three times taller than him.

''Yep, and NO ONE cares that I practically lost my arm AND almost died!" Tien said. (HA! And you thought Tien died, HA!)

Over the coffin, three. crying men stood over it.

"*sniffle* HE WAS SO YOUNG!" Yamcha cried, tightly hugging Goku. Goku cried and hugged back. (You know, like one of those sympathy hugs...what? Oh! EW! NONONO! YOU SICK PERVERT! WHY IN THE HELL WOULD THEY BE GAY? Ass...)

'Man, what a bunch of babies." Said Gohan, the 8-year old.

"Do you guys wanna go watch some football or something." Gohan turned to the midget and Tien.

"YA!" They both said in unison.

"You're awesome, Tien." gohan punched him (playfully) on the arm that is burned, blown-up (somewhat), really bloody and numb. He screamed. Loud but quick.

"OH! Sorry!" Gohan totally forgot, Tien didn't get pissed at him. But Krillin, went over to Gohan's side and punched his arm, hard. Tien screamed REALLY LOUD and punched Krillin down to the ground with his other, GOOD hand.

** The end.**

Back to Yamcha and Goku:

10:00pm- Goku and Yamcha are still in the NON-GAY RELATED hug. (Funeral-2:33pm)

**awesome-**awesome-** **awesome-** **awesome-** **awesome-** **awesome-** **awesome-** **awesome-** **awesome-** **awesome-** **awesome-** **awesome-** **awesome-** **awesome-** **awesome-** **awesome-** **awesome-** **awesome-** **awesome-** **awesome-** **awesome-** **awesome-** **awesome-** **awesome-** **awesome-** **awesome-** **awesome****

**Wasn't that awesome?**


End file.
